Worlds
by HiddenHikari
Summary: Nekozawa is in love with Tamaki, but he doesn't know if he'll ever be loved back. ATTENTION! YAOI! BOYXBOY! Uke!Nekozawa ! XD
1. My World

A short little story, maybe four chapters long, ridiculously short chapters, but hopefully, the crazy amount of fluff will rot your insides out and you won't mind it being so short…XD

---~*~---

I love my little world, shrouded in darkness.

Tamaki Suoh shattered my world into pieces and glued them back together with light.

I love the peace and serenity that comes with darkness.

Tamaki Suoh showed me, whether I wanted to see or not, that light has peace and serenity all the same.

I want to stay the way I am, but I want him equally as bad…if not more.

Tamaki Suoh…what would my life have been like if you had never entered? If the Host Club had never entered?

If I'd stayed sheltered in my darkness for the rest of my life, would I have ever fallen in love? Fallen in love like the way I am right now? Wrapped up in so much love I think I might suffocate. Covered in so much light, I think I'll pass out.

Tamaki, you listen. You don't _push_ me into the light; I _follow_ you into the light. I don't know why I do; I always end up running back, falling back into my endless, dark abyss.

Tamaki Suoh, I want to exist in this world of love and light; I want to exist with you. Show me how you do it; how you live like this. I want to know; I want to join you!

I want to be loved back.

Tamaki Suoh…

Tamaki Suoh…

---~*~---

Tamaki stared at the door to the music room, him and his friends from the host club, dressed up in an odd manner, as usual for them. I stared at them, as usual for me.

I heard Kyouya mumble something to Tamaki, I'm not sure but I think he said, "Where's Haruhi?" Tamaki ignored him, "She's late." He added.

Tamaki didn't turn to look at 'mommy', "I don't know. Maybe she's sick…" He trailed off and I could've sworn I saw a tear start to well as he turned and grabbed the other male by his shirt collar, "WHAT IF ITS LIFE OR DEATH!? WE MUST VISIT HER AT ONCE!"

Kyouya slapped his hand away and pointed toward the door, "I hear footsteps, someone's coming."

Tamaki ran a hand through his slightly messed-up hair and regained his composer before running toward the door as it slowly swung open, "Welcome to the Host Club!" He exclaimed with his eyes closed trying to make his large smile as genuine as possible, but it actually only made it look cheesier. I couldn't help but let out a small chuckle as the others sighed and walked away, mumbling to themselves.

"Tamaki…no." Haruhi said as she swatted Tamaki away.

Tamaki pouted and stood up, walking fast-pace after her, "But why?" He whined.

Haruhi ignored him and disappeared into another part of the room, out of my view. Tamaki followed after her, he also disappeared from my view.

I sighed and closed the door to the Black Magic Club and, back sliding against the door the whole way down, sat on the floor.

Another day gone by and all I did was stalk him from afar. I couldn't get the nerve to make a move on him or whatever. Or maybe…I was waiting for him to make the move, I can't be sure. Maybe there were just too many people, too much light out there, something else stopping me from talking to him other than just me being nervous.

I swear to you, one day, one day I'll do it. I'll come straight out there and talk to you. You might be scared of me, but if you just get to know me you'll know that you're one of the few people in this world I will not hurt.

Tamaki Suoh…

Tamaki Suoh…


	2. Your World

I love your little world, enveloped in love and light.

Admittedly, I could do without the light, but I can ignore it if that's what it takes to co-exist with you.

I will forget about everything that makes me a different being from you. I want us to become one person, to live together in harmony and for you to never leave my side.

Tamaki Suoh, I love you…

Tamaki Suoh…

Tamaki Suoh…

---~*~---

That day…that day was it. I was going make my move. Right then.

I stood and took a deep breath. Tamaki was all alone in the music room, cleaning up after a day of servicing the female half of the student body. I placed my hand on the door knob, but quickly retrieved it to grab the hood of my cloak and pull it firmly over my head. I replaced my hand and began to turn the knob.

The knob squeaked a little, and it startled Tamaki. He turned and for a second I thought he could see me; see right into my mind and soul and my very being.

I held my breath.

Tamaki shrugged and went back to picking up whatever the odd thing he was picking up was.

I let my breath out in a sigh. With all my courage built up, I opened the door and marched straight up to Tamaki.

He turned and looked at me, startled. "Neko-Nekozawa-sempai? Are you…is something the matter?" He asked, glancing around to room, probably looking for help, I guessed. He then took a small glance at my right hand to check for Beelzenev. Of course I hadn't brought it; I knew it scared the taller man.

Tamaki sighed and relaxed a little when he saw it was not present.

I blushed a bit, at a loss for words. "I-uh…How are you?" I asked, sheepishly.

Tamaki let a small laugh stumble from his lips before he uttered, "Hungry and sleepy."

I nodded and took a step back, realizing how 'in his bubble' I was. "Well…we could go get something to eat…together." I proposed shyly. I blushed, "I was going out anyway…" I added

Tamaki only stared at me and I thought for sure he was going to turn me down and laugh in my face. Some part of me knew he wasn't the type to do something as inhuman as that, but I still worried. My worries only disappeared when he smiled and said, "Sure!"

Then we were gone.

I was thrilled. A date! Tamaki had accepted a date with me!

Well, to me it was as much of a date as I needed. To him this was me buying him food, but maybe he secretly wished it a date also.

The same thought kept running through my head as we found a table and the waiter brought us a menu then took up the drink orders: _If I'm fixing the 'hungry' part of how he was feeling, will I also fix the 'tired' part? Will he end up sleeping at my house?_

I hoped so. But I didn't hope for him to just come and crash on my couch. No, that's not what I wanted at all.

I wanted him to sleep in my bed with me after we stay up till at least three A.M. doing…_things_, if you catch my drift.

Tamaki noticed I was a little out of it as I thought about him and myself doing those types of things together and waved a hand in front of my face, saying my name to snap me out of the trance he apparently thought I was in.

"What's wrong?" He had asked. "You invited me here and now you're just going to zone out like that?"

"Oh, sorry." I said, "I guess I just…have a lot on my mind, that's all." I replied, blushing slightly.

"I know how that is…" He said, staring off into the distance. But I had a sneaking suspicion that the Host Club King in fact did not know how it felt, considering his mind seemed to run free unlike everyone else's.

Tamaki looked me in the eyes, "Nekozawa…is this lunch or a date?" He asked seemingly out of nowhere. It caught me off guard and I stuttered.

"I-um…it's whatever you want it to be, I guess." I said hopefully.

"Well then, it's lunch." He said and my heart plummeted, "Because on our first date, I will be the one to do the asking." He added.

I looked up. What? What did he say? It made me smile and the blush grow farther across my face.

Tamaki smiled and my heart felt like popping from my chest.

Am I finally being loved back?

Finally loved sincerely and genuinely by Tamaki Suoh?

A love different than he gives the girls that visit him in the Host Club.

Real love?


	3. Combined Worlds

Note on this chapter! Mentioned HikaruXKaoru!

---~*~---

Tamaki…I would never believe this…

Do you like me back?

Are my dreams not just a lost cause?

Could I really be loved back; a dark, forgot spirit, left behind because of a scary appearance to deal with problems by himself?

That's what I am, you know…

Will you fix that, Tamaki? Will you listen? Will you help?

Of course you will…you always do things like that.

Tamaki, sometimes I think you're _too_ nice.

Tamaki Suoh…

Tamaki Suoh…

---~*~---

I smiled, "O-Okay…but one question. Why do you get to ask me?"

Tamaki reached a hand across the table and placed it under my chin and tilted it up so that I looked him directly in his ocean blue eyes, "Because when you asked me, you looked so cute that I think if you did it again I might die right then and there."

I blushed. I think that was a compliment… I nodded, "We can't have that." I replied and Tamaki laughed.

He thought I was cute, he should've seen himself when he laughs. The waiter comes back with out drinks and Tamaki orders for me. I look Tamaki in the eyes when waiter leaves, "What will we tell the others? How will they react…?" I ask a tad worried.

"The others? They won't care. You've seen Hikaru and Kaoru; we're nothing on the weird scale compared to the twin brothers who are deeply in love with each other." Tamaki replies easily.

I nod, but keep pushing, "What about Kyouya…? Aren't you two sort of a thing?"

Tamaki laughed at me, "Roomers; roomers. My goodness how these things get around. I wouldn't be surprised if Kyouya himself started them to make more money."

I nod again, now I'm satisfied. We're okay. No one will make a big deal of this I hope…

The waiter returns and we eat while we have a light conversation and then Tamaki tells me he'll buy.

We leave the restaurant as it starts to get dark outside. We had come there during the day, so we had walked there from the academy. This would mean we had to walk back to our own houses.

I don't mind, this is my favorite time to take a walk, when it's nice and dark out.

I do, however, mind when we get to the spot on the sidewalk in which we have to go our separate ways. I don't want to leave him yet.

Not yet…

I want just a few more minutes with what feels like my other half.

But we must part, for now anyway. I look at him shyly and he pulls me in for a tight embrace. I snuggle into the nape of his neck.

I never once would've thought something like this could happen to someone like me.

He pulls away and looks me in the eyes, "I'll see you tomorrow…sempai." He says the last word softly so I have to strain to hear him. He turns and leaves.

I watch as his body becomes a mere silhouette against the small stone wall he walks next to. I look up into the sky and feel a small drop of rain hit my forehead. I reach back and pull on the hood of my cloak which I had taken down when we had left restaurant and it was dark outside.

I'm not sure what to do as I watch him disappear behind a curve in the side walk. But before I even have time to think about it, my feet are carrying me toward him. I'm practically running. I almost trip and fall, "TAMAKI!" I shout as I stumble forward and my arms fly around his torso. He tenses, I guess he was surprised. Anyone would be, I guess.

He looks back at me and smiles, "Sempai?" He asks, "Do you…want to come over…?"

I blush but don't look away. I feel like my whole body is frozen upon him inviting me to come to his house. I do, however, think about it for a minute even though I knew that I wanted to go. I end up nodding shyly.

He puts his hand down near mine and entwines his fingers with mine. I want to kiss him, but I think I'll wait for now. Maybe let him make the first move in kissing category.

Tamaki smiles down at me and I hide my face in my cloak. I hear him laugh, but I don't feel offended.

We walk only a couple more blocks before arriving at a large mansion. Huge windows and a gigantic front door welcome us there. I turn onto the walkway, but Tamaki pulls me away.

I look at him confused and he motions with his head to go around back. I shrug and follow him.

In the backyard, I see Tamaki walk to an electrical box of some sort, he flips on a switch and I see the garden in the back come alive. It's so bright, but I can't help but stare. All the flowers are so pretty even if the light is blinding. After a moment of staring I start to feel woozy and wobble over to Tamaki, leaning on his shoulder. "Can you…turn those back off…?" I ask him gently.

He looks at me, the feeling of 'I'm so sorry! I've just done the worst thing in my life!' practically coming off him in waves. He quickly turns the lights off and I immediately feel better, although I don't switch positions and continue leaning on him.

"Are you…okay?" He asks when I don't lift off him. I nod and he smiles at me again. "What? Do you want me to carry you or something?" He asks, joking.

"Please?" I joke back. Tamaki laughs, I think he understood that I didn't really _need_ to be carried, but he picks me up anyhow.

I snuggle into his neck; I never would've thought that he would be so strong.

He carries me to the edge of the garden, but by the time we're in I jump out and I end up taking the lead. You see, I'm used to the dark so my eyes adjust quickly, but Tamaki…oh Tamaki Suoh is not exactly the greatest person to have walking around in the dark with out any light at all…

Tamaki was falling and tripping over things I saw a mile before we got to them, for a while I thought I would have to carry him. I didn't think I could. Eventually we got to the end of the trial on the garden and at the end was a large, sturdy tree trunk. I looked back at Tamaki, he was about four or five steps behind me, and asked him why the path stopped so suddenly.

When he got up to me I was surprised to see him reach up on the tree, he actually had to use a few pieces of wood that was nailed onto the tree to get up high enough, and grabbed a small string. He pulled it down and a wooden latter feel down onto the ground.

Tamaki started to climb up the latter, about half way to the top he stopped and looked down at me. "What is it?"

I looked around, I little embarrassed. "This isn't…where you sleep is it?"

Tamaki laughed, "No, I have a room inside, but I like to come up here occasionally to get away from my grandmother." He explained before disappearing into the small box shaped building in the tree.

I sighed and followed after him.

Inside the house, it was actually pretty roomy. Fully furnished too. A chair, a couch, a small mini-fridge with a plug in for electricity, and a bed was there too. I figured being up there would make me feel like a kid because of the size, but it actually felt like I was in a very empty bedroom. Minus all the dressers and such a bedroom would normally have.

Now that we were up there, I took a seat on the bed. _I wonder what's going to happen next…_ I ask myself.

---~*~---

Note about next chapter! It will be lime! Not quite lemons, but still intense!


	4. Our World

I love our little world; in our world light and darkness can exist together. In our world love and hate can be friends.

I wanted to know how to be like you, how stay in the light and not crumple down from the strong amount of brightness the sun gives off.

You didn't show me.

I am disappointed, but you did something good enough. You have come into the dark with me. You don't care anymore about the fact that I could probably kill you at any given moment if you annoy me.

Even though we both no I wouldn't.

How could I?

You are my world, Tamaki, and something tells me that I am yours.

Tamaki Suoh…

Tamaki Suoh…

---~*~---

I looked around the large room when I felt another weight on the bed, very near to me.

I look to my left and I see Tamaki has sat next me. He is staring at me, and for some reason it gives me goose bumps.

I look away and busy my self with straightening the pillows on the medium sized bed.

The bed was rather plain, much like the rest of the décor in the room. A simple white sheet, light blue blanket, a second blanket folded and lay at the bottom of the bed, and two simple white pillows.

Tamaki looked at me. "What?" I asked.

"Nothing." Tamaki said before leaning in and kissing me lightly on the lips.

This shocked me for a moment, but that disappeared after I felt his hands snake around my body.

I felt like melting into him, just relaxing my whole body and letting him have his way with me.

I really did feel like doing that…

I almost did, until I felt your strong arms start to push me over onto the bed. I lay there, back down, feeling very vulnerable.

I thought my virginity was as good as gone when I felt you deepen the kiss. I felt like kicking my self when I let your tongue come inside my mouth.

I felt like kicking _Tamaki_ when he started to grind against me, but I also felt like grinding back.

In fact, I did.

And if felt _good_. _God,_ it felt so good!

I almost moaned until I felt Tamaki's hands start to pull my cloak off. I knew it was dark, but I would feel utterly naked without it. But I still let him slide it off me. Next I felt him start to work on taking off my pants. I could feel the bulge growing in his pants and I felt a bit selfish when I pulled away.

Tamaki looked down at me, "What's…wrong?" He asked.

"I…I…um…I don't think I'm…I don't think we should do this just yet, Tamaki." I finally spat out.

Tamaki nodded in understanding. That was a good thing. He smiled down at me. "It's fine. I'll wait." He replied smoothly, "Because you're worth waiting for." He said this so seriously despite how corny it was.

That made a smile take over my features.

So love was obtainable.

Not completely extinct for someone like me.

A dark, shadowy figure who had finally found a light.

Tamaki Suoh…

You are my light, my love, and my life.

Tamaki Suoh…

Tamaki Suoh…


End file.
